As I wake up with my thoughts stuck on negative experiences, I wonder…
Ruled by the Creator, or the creation. Submission to the Creator, or the creation. Accountable to the Creator, or the creation…Who are you accountable to?
Who are you accountable to?
Who do you allow yourself to be controlled by?
Who? …The No-name, or the named? Who is ‘God’…the No-name…accountable to?!
Unhindered, unburdened, no slight of pride…travelling freely through the universe. Joyous exuberance. No doubt, no fear.
Then, what is creation?
Things created by a creator, inhabited by spirit caught in flesh. Succumbed to slights of pride, burdened by doubt and fear…burdened by the sense of having been kicked off the joyous bandwagon…the joyous, unhindered, thrusting motion of creative freedom, moving freely, moving forward, untouched by the burden of doubt.
Doubt caused a derailment of spirit…caused it to crash outside of itself. Left in the trailing remnant of things…and into these things it nestled itself…abandoned…left behind. A spirit, an offshoot of thought, a thought entertained. A doubt niggled, and grew…’I’m alone’…it wept. ‘Why have I been abandoned, what have I done’?
Niggling doubts turn into bitter resentments. Venom entails…
“Watch out anyone who gets in my way. I will destroy!”
Why are you there?
Lonely, bitter, betrayed… so it seems.
Why did the doubt arise in the first place?
A displaced thought…an offshoot…took root…started growing.
What caused the offshoot?
The thrusting, forward moving, creative, joyous, rapturous motion of the No-name. A spark of itself flew off of itself, and there found itself…on the sidelines…“How do I get back on the trailing blaze of Glory? I’m left behind. Why don’t they come back and get me”? …Small doubts slowly building till it becomes a great ball of thriving doubt, eating and feeding of itself… “Hell! …This tastes shit! What have I done to deserve this”?!